Lovingly Teaching Manners and Etiquette: Nurturing the Gift of Hospitality in Our Children

young girl in blue dress Christmas dress placing setting fresh bread on beautiful Christmas table

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November, with its festive spirit leading up to Thanksgiving, presents the perfect opportunity to emphasize the importance of manners and etiquette in our homes. As we gather around the dinner table, not only do we share a meal, but we also share values, traditions, and life lessons. One of the foundational skills that seamlessly integrates etiquette and practicality is the art of setting the table.

The Importance of Manners and Etiquette

Before delving into the specifics of table-setting, it's essential to understand the broader significance of teaching manners to our children. Manners are more than just arbitrary rules; they are an expression of respect, consideration, and love for the people around us. When we say "please" or "thank you", hold the door for someone, or set the table correctly, we are acknowledging the intrinsic value of individuals and the community we share.

Starting with Setting the Table

Table manners offer a tangible way for children to practice etiquette daily. Setting the table, in particular, is a chore that even young children can participate in, and it imparts a sense of responsibility, attention to detail, and an understanding of the rhythm of family life.

Basic Table Setting Guidelines:

  1. Placemat: Begin with a placemat. This not only defines each person's space but also protects the table.

  2. Flatware: Remember the word "FORKS."

    • F is for Fork, which goes to the left of the plate.

    • O signifies the shape of the Plate (think "O" for "oval").

    • R stands for Right, where the knife and spoon go.

    • K is for Knife, which is set to the right of the plate.

    • S is for Spoons, which go next to the knife.

  3. Glassware: Glasses are placed above the knife, with water glasses to the left and wine or other beverage glasses to its right.

  4. Napkins: These can either be laid to the left of the forks or on the center of the dinner plate.

  5.  Dining Etiquette: Once the table is set, this is a great time to introduce basic dining etiquette:

    • Wait for everyone to be seated before starting.

    • Place the napkin on the lap.

    • Use utensils from the outside in (for meals with multiple courses).

    • Chew with closed mouths and avoid talking with full mouths.

    • Say "please" when asking for something to be passed.

A family style table set for Christmas with Christmas tree in the background

Beyond the Table

While setting the table provides a hands-on lesson in etiquette, it's essential to extend these principles into daily life. Manners are the external expressions of inner values. They teach children empathy, patience, and the importance of community. They also pave the way for meaningful interactions and relationships.

Remember, it's not about perfection but consistency. Mistakes will be made, and that's okay. Each misstep is an opportunity to gently correct and guide, reinforcing the lessons of respect and consideration.

As we prepare for the holiday season and gather around our tables, let's take a moment to appreciate the beauty of shared meals, family traditions, and the lessons we pass on to the next generation. Here's to gracious living and loving gatherings.



Xoxo,


Mandy

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